I'm Just Searching for Love: Faith, A Woman of Hope

A childhood taken due to tragic circumstances. Her father died early in her life. Her mother was an addict. She shuffled through homes. She eventually did a short stint with a family member, but then was placed in the foster care system. She remained in the custody of the courts until she graduated from Juvenile Hall. There were chronic abuses - emotional, physical and sexual, which led to a woman full of rage. She didn't have love for anyone (especially herself) and she was unable to feel love from anyone. She grew up without hope, and felt neglected. 


She was hurting so much, but didn't know how to grieve the loss of her innocence. Any ability to be vulnerable or trusting had been squashed. Faith had been sold for drugs, and believed she was worthy of no more. She attempted suicide multiple times, and was passed around several foster homes.


As she continued to rage, she took it out on those around her. Creating more havoc, she fueled the cycle of abuse, distrust and neglect.  Faith began to run away from her foster homes.  She didn't want to be alone, so she ran to her biological mom.  Despite the horrors of her early childhood, she wanted a relationship with her mom. She just wanted her mother's love.  So the cycle continued.


As a foster youth, she received a grant and walked through the doors of college. She did not finish. Instead she met her husband, who was also a resident in Juvenile Hall.  This relationship led to a life of partying. She got pregnant and had her first son. She raised her son alone the first 6 months of his life while his dad was in prison. When her husband got out of jail they built a relationship but it wasn't the same.


Meth was introduced, and it was like a monster came out. Physical and psychological abuse began.  Although Faith was terrified, she endured the abuse as fair trade for the few times he said he loved her. She had never known a love that was good.


Her husband was going in and out between jail stints when she became pregnant with her second son and Faith went to a domestic violence shelter. She felt a little bit of security going to the shelter, but she would go back and forth between the shelter and returning back to the abuse.


Finally, after another attempted suicide, Faith asked her husband's parents to help with the children. But she still didn't know what to do, and Faith started her journey of alcoholism as she went searching once again for a love she never truly felt.


Still searching for that love, Faith was led into the arms of another man. But her estranged husband grew jealous and beat her so badly that she ended up in the hospital where she found out she was once again pregnant.


When Faith got out of the hospital, her new boyfriend had gone to prison, and she found herself homeless again. On the streets, while her children where staying with grandparents, she was feeling the agony of the lack of love in her life. She was hopeless and lost. One day at 8 months pregnant, Faith prayed, "God help me get my family back." That night she ended up in the hospital for her gall bladder. During the stay in the hospital she reached out to a residential program. During the treatment at the recovery center she decided she wanted to change her life. So she went searching for that change online, and she found Acres of Hope. Faith says, "Acres of Hope has helped her to remain sober, get her boys back, disconnect from unhealthy relationships." She is paying off restitution, and working to get licensed.


Faith has been learning to love herself, she feels loved, cared about, and has support. Faith shares Ephesians 6:8, "to be strong in the Lord", which is the verse she clings too. She has been able to build close, trusting relationships, and see life in a new way. Acres of Hope inspires her daily to be the woman she was made to be.


Faith is very lovable, and she is a Woman of Hope who is radiating a new found love.

visit: acresofhopeonline.org
call: 530-878-8030
to share your story of hope email Jackie Turner @